for Becci
.
If I had painted myself today
I would have been thinking
of our conversation and how
.
you seem to be in two places
at once while I — take chase
in hopes of getting sympathy
.
for an aged cheese, long sitting
on the shelf in wait of a gourmet
taster, just like you, someone
.
who’s not deterred in the least by
stinky concoctions, can see them for
what they are — real, incased, beauty
.
in a tough rind, the skin of this
body politic, the only one evident
to me at this time. “I don’t think
.
you understand,” I say to myself after
the conversation has gone on to other
doings. I’m so tempted to say, “What good
.
will it do?” But I don’t. Instead I look
for anything that could serve as pigment,
binder, carriers, brushes –preparing.
.
As I paint myself today, the body which
is not me, returns into its elemental
unfolding falling back towards the
.
natural order of its emanation: water
to water; seed to seed; fold unto fold;
mineral saturations and truth and grit.
.
“What/where is that other place you exist?”
.